This article will address something currently very near and dear to my heart. This past Sunday I was dwelling in mortal agony after having several too many beers Saturday night. The whole day was a write-off, but could have been even worse had I not employed a few tried and true methods of easing the pain. I hope you’ll find this guide useful if and when you find yourself in similar day after agony.

10 – Don’t drink in the first place!

Okay, technically not a hangover cure, but a hangover prevention. Still there are those who will argue this is the most effective method of avoiding a hangover (probably those that argue that abstinence is the best form of birth control), so I’ll give it a spot on the list to prevent the arguments before they begin.

9 – Vitamin B-6, B-12 and a whole lot of water before bed

Low levels of vitamins B-6 and B-12 can multiply your hangover pain. Choke down a couple of horse pills of vitamin B, and try and drink a 250 ml cup of water for every beer you had. Don’t be alarmed by the radioactive glow from your urine. It’s just the vitamin B doin’ its thing.

8 – Eat a large meal before you start drinking

This technique is kind of a double-edged sword. Having a lot of food in your stomach before you start drinking will help ease the pain you feel the next day, but it will also make it more difficult for you to get drunk quickly. Since I’m going to assume that getting drunk for the least money possible is your goal it might not be your strategy of choice for hangover prevention. Finding a balance is good. Definitely don’t start drinking on a completely empty stomach or your night will be over much faster than you want it to be.

7 – Get some fresh air and exercise

While in the throes of hangover pain the last thing you might want to consider is leaving the cool, dark cocoon of your bat cave in favor of the hot sun and a bike ride, but believe me, it will speed up the healing process. The sun on your face is a miraculous healer, and the fresh air will make your nose and stomach a whole lot happier than your beer breath bedroom.

6 – A nice greasy breakfast

If you can summon up the energy make yourself a nice greasy skillet of eggs, bacon and hashbrowns fried in a generous dollop of butter. Barring that, a trip to IHoP, Denny’s, or McDonalds should do the trick. You’re stomach is sensitive the day after. It wants comfort food. At the very least, all that grease will provide some lubricant if breakfast comes back up later.

5 – Lots and lots of gatorade

One of the main sources of discomfort the morning after a bender is the extremely dehydrated state of your body. If you drank a bunch of water before bed you’ve probably eased this condition somewhat, but just like hard exercise, alcohol leeches more from your body than just water. Gatorade helps replenish the electrolytes, and helps get your body into balance. Don’t drink the blue though. If you’re chucking you don’t want to see that coming back up.

4 – Ibuprofen

Kind of a no-brainer on a top 10 list of hangover cures, but it is effective at getting rid of that pain that is hammering away behind your eyeballs. Gentler on your liver than Tylenol.

3 – Sleep

Those with kids might be out of luck when it comes to getting the rest they need to kill they hangover. Alcohol interferes with the sleep process, so even if you were out like a light for 8 hours the night before you may have only got the equivalent of 4 hours of regular sleep. A proper amount of rest will go a long way towards curing your hangover. Not only that, but the more time you spend asleep, the less time you spend suffering.

2 – Make yourself puke

This is probably the last thing you want to contemplate doing, and should be saved as a last resort to help eliminate that hangover that just won’t go away. Still, on this whole list of top 10 hangover cures it is probably the one method that has the most immediate impact. Mere seconds after emptying your stomach of last night’s toxins (or this morning’s blue Gatorade) you will find you feel immeasurably better. If you can’t take the pain anymore and want to hurry up the healing process stick the old finger down the throat for immediate results.

1 – More booze

When your breath is reeking of beer, your head pounding, and your stomach churning, it is hard to imagine feeding your body more of what is causing all these problems. The irony is much of your pain is being caused by your body because it wants you to do just that. It’s not happy you’ve stopped feeding it booze. It was enjoying the booze, and now it’s paying you back for cutting off its precious supply. Yes, good old withdrawal symptoms, surely one of nature’s cruelest tricks. So, if you think you can stomach it, plug your nose and swill back a drink – preferably a bloody mary, or some other concoction that contains a generous amount of vitamin C. You wouldn’t think so, but your body will thank you for it.

There you have it, the top 10 hangover cures for killing the pain of the night before. Hopefully you can put them to good use.

Featured image by Smabs Sputzer